More insane pedaling. Got up to 181 RPM's today (Tuesday). Work was slow, but still sucked. I found out someone made a mistake in April that caused someone to get a $3000 drug for free. I couldn't even scream at them because the pharmacist responsible quit to move to Iowa last week.

Remember the crazy lady I saw wandering around wearing like 3 back packs long sleeves and a jacket? On the way home from the Hawthorne ride Saturday I saw her on a bike! She was on 6th st. The bike was black and shiny- looked new. I wonder what her deal is. I've always wanted to be one of those crazy Gainesville characters- like the guy that ran all over town with his arm in the air or the dude in the suit that limps around with the briefcase.

I just need a gimmick. Maybe I'll bike around town in a giant furry cat costume handing out cup cakes laced with oxycodone.

Thursday did my one minute intervals on the Sempre while commuting to and from work. I do 4 intervals of hard riding in the morning and 4 on the way home in the afternoon. It is kind of tricky because of traffic, pedestrians and random weirdness. I have these discrete areas that allow me to bug out but it's still tricky.

Saw the Cyclist on Fire this morning which along with eating an insanely delicious hummus/bean pita was the highlight of my work day. Here is a retail tip, if you (the customer) act like a jackhole no one is going to go out of their way to help you with your problem.

Also I saw a girl in the pharmacy screaming at her mother "YOU ARE A LIAR!!" over and over. Apparently this stemmed from a disagreement over whether an 8 year old should be able to use a credit card on the internet.

Finally, we mercifully ran out of oxycodone today. Unfortunately we get more tomorrow.

Lots of ground to cover. Tuesday morning ride to work. School was still in session. What do these kids have left to learn? Anyway I dodged all of the cars dropping kids off, said hey to all the usual crossing guards and weaved through the children with Barbie Princess backpacks for what the paper promises is the absolute last school day of the year.

The church on 34th/16th Ave had the word "Hoarders" posted in the marque. The quotes are theirs. I pondered this vague message but did not know what to make of it. I wondered what was being hoarded. To their credit the church did not appear to be making a value judgment on the hoarders. It just said "Hoarders". I think more churches should post open ended messages. Some churches try to get with the times and say "God has sent you a friend request."

So Tuesday is when I put the Cortina in a super low gear and pedal like a mofo just to go 14mph. I have no reason for doing this other than to amuse myself. Periodically I try to pedal as fast as I absolutely can. Each time I get up to 174 rpm. 200 rpm is my Holy Grail.

This morning (Wednesday) was the Glider ride. I was determined to be on my best behavior. There was a large contingent of riders that included, Boss Hogg, Skeletor, Publix, the Parakeet and several unfamiliar riders. The large group meant we rode double pace line for much of the ride. This invariably turns the ride into a social club with people chatting with the cyclist next to them. Of course I said nothing to the dude next to me which appeared to be fine with him. So we were all cruising along. I was dutifully not running people off the road, coming to complete stops at all intersections, maintaining my speed appropriately, pointing out obstacles and traffic- really just being a model group cyclist.

The last section Boss Hogg started to get ants in his pants as I knew he would. He started lighting it up as we approached 53rd Ave. It was him, this big dude I call the Semi and me. Boss Hogg is leading at 28mph. For the first time I witness Boss Hogg starting to tire. I always thought of him as the mutant cross between Predator and the Terminator. Maybe he was daydreaming about stealing the life force from some beginning cyclists and was distracted. In any case the Semi booms in a commanding voice "I'll drive!" and with that passes Boss Hogg. I follow expecting his mastodon like legs to open up a worm hole in the space time continuum. However his "driving" lasts all of 30 seconds then he drops back. So now I'm in front. I lay down 26-27 mph for 2 minutes then have to drop back. Hogg is waiting in the wings. I reattach behind him for a little while but cannot hang on. Three other dudes that had just been chillin' the whole time behind me pass by. And that was that. We regrouped at 53rd and 441.

I am getting a better feel for these sprints. Namely they don't last forever and everyone is hurting. Thankfully no lectures today because if someone had stepped to me over some BS I swear I would have turned that mother flippin' bike lane into a grave yard.

Caught up on all kinds of sleep by sleeping 11 hours last night. Solid ride on my Millhopper loop this morning. Rode the Hawthorne trail with the Cyclist on Fire (CoF). He is a beastmaster on his new bike. At one point some guy mouthed off to me about being in his way. I'd love to know what it is about me that makes people think they can step to me and start talking shit. CoF got this insane look on his face and sped off after him. I thought he was going to kill that guy, but I guess he didn't want to mess up his $3700 lynx coat because after a minute he chilled.

The Sunday ride to work was easy like Sunday morning. My commutes on the Cortina have evolved into slow relaxing rides, 10-14 mph.

Friday morning I headed out to do the 30 mile Racetrack loop. Of course this route was the site of my crash one week ago and like Judas Priest I was screaming for vengeance. The wind and traffic conditions were right and I felt good enough to post my personal best time. I reached my goal of riding in under 1 hr 30 minutes, averaging 19.7 mph which was cool.

I'm pumped to ride the Hawthorne trail tomorrow with the Cyclist On Fire and his new bike.

This morning (Wednesday) was the scheduled Gliders group ride. The Lone Biker of the Apocalypse (me) rode to the Chevron on 43rd which serves as the point of departure. I was recently chastened by the mild rebukes of a couple of the group members last week, being dropped by Boss Hogg and the Guest Lecturer and wiping out trying to make a turn on Friday. I vowed to maintain a low profile and not piss anyone off or injure myself.

At the gas station Boss Hogg and the Guest Lecturer were no shows, so I was riding with the sucker free club. We head out on a route I had never been on before. I'm towards the back of the pace line just chillin. My turn to lead comes up. When that happens you have to start pedaling a lot harder because now you're facing the wind resistance. Immediately this rider I call the Parakeet (small, flits around) comes up and says, "You are apparently new at this. When the previous rider pulls off don't start hammering it because they are dead and out of breath." I'm just like OK, OK, thank you. Inside I'm thinking "Cheese and rice, I'm not up front for 30 seconds and the lectures start right up. Plus I looked at my computer log later. I was only doing 20.5 mph. That's the group's normal speed. So anyway I dutifully slow down.

At this point I'm at a loss. I am now so self- conscious riding with these people it's totally frustrating. Later in the ride I'm up at the front again. This time mindful of my latest lesson I very gradually increase my effort and try not to over do it. I look in my little mirror and I see the group is way back there. So I slow down and wait for them. I am informed that I rolled through a stop sign instead of coming to a complete stop. I'm thinking "Are you effing kidding me? We are on a bleeping county road in the middle of nowhere." I respect their adherence to the rules of the road, but I just wasn't in the mood.

Later we are in the final leg of the ride. We are on the same road I wiped out on last Friday. A turn comes up. I see loose gravel and brake some, still mindful of my injuries. This causes Publix (guy who used to work at Publix) to run off the road and into the grass to avoid hitting me. He is cool about it, but that doesn't exactly boost my precarious standing in the group as the road sign running scofflaw who loves to force people off the road when he isn't busy going too fast except when he goes too slow.

We cross 441, I am up front again, super paranoid about my every pedal stroke. I look in my mirror the group is all strung out again. How did this happen? I am going slowly. The group captain says some people didn't make it across 441 in time. When I crossed I thought we were all together and there was no imminent traffic. Fine, whatever.

At this point the ride itself has been boring. I keep hoping someone will call me so at least I could rock out to Pavement's "Grounded" on my ringtone. We passed a mailbox that had the name T. Moore painted on it. I dreamed that Sonic Youth lived there and strained to hear gentle waves of feedback echoing across the country side.

Back to reality, we are on 43rd street about 2.5 miles away from the finish. This is where they usually pick it up and I get dropped, which is another source of annoyance. But today the overall pace has been slow. Plus between the scolding from the Parakeet and the two group break ups, I haven't been working very hard when leading. So I am pretty rested up. They are sprinting and it's on. I look at my speedometer. I'm partying at 31mph, thinking about my sick ass metal on metal pedals and all the watts I'm raining down upon them. It's me and 2 other dudes. Skeletor is up front, Publix and me. Skeletor drops off. Publix and I are next to each other. Publix stops pedaling and I keep going. Maybe the sprint is to some sign post or land mark, I don't know. I do know that I didn't go out like a chump which in the scheme of things doesn't mean much but it means a little.